相敬如宾

Pronunciation: xiāng jìng rú bīn Literal meaning: Respect each other like guests

Origin & Usage

The Zuo Zhuan records an official passing a field and seeing a man's wife bring him his meal there: the two treated one another 如宾, as guests, and on the strength of that the man was recommended for office. The reasoning is that courtesy sustained where nobody is watching is evidence of character. Mutual respect (相敬) at the pitch owed to a guest (如宾) is the phrase, and in practice it is used of long marriages — admiringly, though a modern ear may catch a little coolness in it as well.

Examples

English: "Their long marriage was built on mutual respect."

Chinese: 他们的婚姻长久，建立在相敬如宾的基础上。